Izzy recently moved into her toddler bed. It happened without protest and rather-- surprisingly--gracefully. We had to discard her crib mattress (long story) so we didn't have much of a choice. She was happy and excited, literally giggling with joy as we left her to slumber in her "new bed". I was heart broken. Well, I was happy too. I suffered from that feeling of watching my kids grow up and wanting to find a pause button. My daughter had bravely left the safety and security of her crib, where we had put her every night and every nap for most of her life.
I was thankful that it went so well, of course. Lately, I've been trying to bring nearly everything to God in prayer (having two kids has brought me to my knees in a good way, I guess.) And this transition felt like an answer. She had such confidence! I would like to think it had something to do with our bedtime parenting but without extensive research with double-blind studies of twins with matching DNA, I will never know. We never made bedtime a punishment and on only very few occasions left her to cry in her crib. That meant a little less free time for us and a lot more energy in helping her calm down. Without a DVR, it sometimes meant missing the first fifteen minutes of The Office, something she will have to somehow make up to us later. It meant lots of precious, wonderful moments of rocking and singing, too. And many late night bottle deliveries (we would pack a cooler each night and take it to our room as if we were going on a picnic). Eventually those stopped and we only had nighttime visits once in a great while.
Her new independence leaves me wondering if we should have co-slept longer. We tried it for about three months when we first moved. It helped during Izzy's adjustment to a new home, but ended promptly when I awoke to her trying to crawl off the end of the mattress. Too much nighttime excitement for me! She moved back into her crib without protest. Still, I hope that when the girls are older they will want to crawl back into bed with their old folks and cuddle for a bit.
I'm reminded of something my nephew Ty recently said to my sister Regan as he was going to sleep in her bed. He said, "Momma, you know why I like sleeping with you? Because I don't have as many bad dreams. And if I do have a bad dream I know you are right here and I feel better." I hope, partly for selfish reasons, that one day we will be that safe harbor for our girls. Until then, I will be thankful for their confidence in facing brave new worlds like the "new bed".
